April is Stress Awareness Month

It seems to me very sad that stress is so much a part of many people’s lives that we need to raise awareness about it every year. Since 1992, the month of April has been designated the month in which we are encouraged to take stock of our stress levels, the factors driving it and what we can do to reduce it.

When we say we are stressed, we generally mean we are feeling overwhelmed, trying to cope with things beyond our capacity to do so. Most people experience this of course at one time or another, but for some it is a chronic situation.

One useful way of making changes in our lives is by taking a 30-day period such as this, to really try out those things that can reduce our stress. By trying the new over a 30-day period, we are not only more likely to focus on what we are trying to achieve but can treat it as an experiment that we evaluate at the end. As you can imagine, these kinds of 30-day experiments can be useful in all sorts of arenas.

One useful tool I sometimes give those clients who worry a lot, is the following.

Set aside 20 minutes a day as your ‘worry period‘. Write down everything about which you are worrying. Continue for no longer than 20 minutes. When you have your list, go through it and decide which of those items you can have some influence over, those that you can take action on with the possibility of changing. Then decide which of those you have absolutely no control over (often these relate to other people’s behaviour) and those that are hypothetical such as “what if I get the virus?” (often hypothetical worries start with ‘what if’)

Those that are labelled as ones you can have influence over, take action. Make a plan about how you will deal with it and take that action. You would be surprised how many of us worry about things that we just need to take action on.

Actions might include in the first instance getting information, asking someone for help, doing something you have been avoiding. You will be surprised at how much relief you will get from taking action.

Those you have labelled as hypothetical, decide that since you have no knowledge of whether these will happen or not, that you will choose not to worry about them.

As you do this, you may have items on your list you are unsure whether you can have any influence over. Take a good look at these. If necessary, ask a trusted person for their input. Many of the things we think we cannot influence in any way we actually can.

Doing the above is the most important part of the exercise. This is not an exercise in just listing your worries.

You can repeat this exercise every day. When a worrying thought or thoughts come into your mind, make a quick note of them and consign them to your 20 minute ’worry period’ when you will look at them properly.

As you do this, not only might you prevent worry invading your every moment but may also find that there are many creative ways in which you can take action on those things that are bothering you. Bear in mind that sometimes taking action means making an attitude change. Once you take action, you are back in the driving seat again. Those things over which you decide you really don’t have any control at all, well you might as well decide not to waste your energy and well-being on them.

A useful book on worry from which I have taken this exercise is by Dr. Martin Rossmann entitled “The Worry Solution”. It is well worth reading if worry is an issue for you.

Of course, if you feel you need further help with reducing your worry, getting help from a professional may be the way to go.